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Writer's pictureDr. Dylesia

What does saying “I have a mother wound” really mean?

Updated: Nov 20



The phrase “mother wound” refers to the internal void and subsequent longing that results from a child being emotionally abandoned or neglected by their mother. A mother wound emerges when a child’s emotional needs are ignored by their mother or when a mother only inconsistently gives her child emotional attention. 


Children with an unmended mother wound:


  • Feel unseen, incomplete, and misunderstood 

  • Repeatedly seek approval, acceptance, and validation 

  • Are uncertain about their where they stand with others, even when given constant reassurance 

  • Struggle to find comfort or security in their relationships

  • Misuse alcohol, drugs, food, sex, religion, social media, video games, money or other substances in an attempt to fill their emotional voids 


If you consider your mother a safe and dependable source of emotional support, it is unlikely that the differences of opinion you two experience are more than normal relationship conflict. Conversely, if your relationship with your mother is characterized by a history of upsetting, painful, frightening, and/or distressing experiences, your injuries may be more than wounds and instead be better described by the term “mother-daughter/son trauma.” 


Learn more about mother-child conflicts and mother-daughter/son trauma by clicking the links above. 


For a side-by-side comparison of mother-child conflicts, mother wounds, and mother-daughter/son trauma, click here.


Did you know that Dr. Dylesia developed a clinical tool to assess for mother-daughter/son conflict, wounding, and trauma? And that you can use your rating to receive customized treatment recommendations and therapy? Start the journey toward leveling into your thriving era by completing the Mother-Daughter/Son Conflict, Wounding, & Trauma (CWT) Scale self-assessment here!

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